Seriously how many of us out there have this issue? *Raise hand* I DO! I’ve been on the chubbier side since I would say 5th grade, but then I was maybe 20lbs over weight not too bad. I have always been picked on for my size and still do to this day. Being a fat person really sucks and for some of us its not our fault. There are people who eat when they are stressed or depressed and eat cause they just love food. Well then there are people who are fat because of medicines. That’s where I fit in, when I was about 15y/o I was told I had PCOS, which is common in girls/women these days, also at that point my sugar levels where up A LITTLE. So the doctor went and put me on medicine as if I was a diabetic when I wasn’t and still not. I ended up gaining 150lbs+. Needless to say I took myself off the medicine, since I gained that weight quick. The doctor told me that I would gain no weight, yet in the side effects said may gain weight, go figure.
When I graduated High School in 06′ I was weighing in at 360lbs give or take a few, I had to be weighed at my doctors because the school scales didn’t go high enough. I was so embarrassed with myself, I was into a size 26-28 jeans. I can remember being in the 6th grade and already wearing jeans that were a size 16, now that’s fat for a 12y/o but wasn’t really that pudgy just had the hips.
I have tried many of things to try and lose the weight, I even tried going on medicine my doctor prescribed me to lose weight and well I think I lost 5lbs and that was it, so I gave up. When I found out I was pregnant for T, I was 6wks along and at the time I weighed in at 363lbs. When I went to the doctors on my due date they weighed me again and I was 386lbs. but I didn’t have T until 4 days later. I was considered a high risk pregnancy because I am fat, well they sent me to a specialist so they can do an ultrasound on T to see if they saw if he was going to be born with anything not grown right, but guess what all they seen was a healthy baby growing! I may be fat but I gave birth to a healthy beautiful baby boy.
Yesterday I weighed myself and had to do it 3 times and said I am currently at 339lbs. Which I am so excited about it since I was at 341lbs for several months, I would go up a few ounces and go down a few ounces lol. I don’t pig out on food or sweets unlike some people but I do drink Pepsi BUT I do not go over board with it. I eat smaller portions of food more throughout the day, I don’t do the whole eat a ton of food at a setting. My fiance picks on me cause I eat small portions but I told him hey it works for me and I am filled up with how much I eat.
I am just at my wits with my weight. I have just recently started watching The Biggest Loser. I told myself I would never get into those types of shows, but one night nothing was on and decided to watch it, now every Tuesday night we sit down and watch it. Last week I started to get teary eyed and choked up cause it was what they call the “transformation week” and I was basically jealous because I feel deep down I will never get down to the size I want and look decent. My uncle has told me many of times “if you lose so much weight in a year I will give you a $50 bill”, and “oh hunny I am so worried about your weight its not healthy”. It gets so old and annoying, but guess what he is now starting to get fat weighing it at almost 250lbs and yet he still has stuff to say about my weight. AHHHHHH it just annoys me, sorry.
I went to my OBGYN a few months ago and she wanted to do some test basically to see if I had anything wrong with me caused from being fat. Guess what…I am healthy as can be except my Cholesterol was A LITTLE up but she said that is normal for being on the big side, but other then that I have NOTHING else. I got teary eyed with excitement when she said that. My aunt is diabetic and other stuff and she weighs less then me, but she still continues to pig out on the sweets. I actually stumped my doctor, I talked to her because we want to try for another child. She said that I needed to lose 10% of my body fat, technically before pregnancy I have lost 20lbs (don’t count the weight gained during pregnancy). But I told her I was fatter then when I got pregnant compare to now, and she couldn’t believe me. She said well then just keep having sex and you’ll get pregnant then, how bout that I actually stumped a doctor.
Overall, I want to get down to at least 250lbs but really down to 200lbs but 250lbs I would be okay with for now. But I am having a really hard time doing so. I am a very picky eater hence another reason why I eat so little. Getting exercise is hard because I can’t afford a gym and the YMCA has problems with poor fat people and personally I don’t like working out around other people cause they just stare and you can tell they are judging you. I really need some advice on trying to lose weight. I really want to start and need some help, it has to be stuff that won’t make me go out and have to spend a fortune on cause we live on paycheck to paycheck.
I am sorry if all that ranting about my weight annoys anyone, I just want to get it off my chest and express everything. I am truly a great person just on the heavy side. I really want to lose the weight. I am sick and tired of looking in the mirror and seeing a fat ugly person. So again if anyone has suggestions please feel free to post them I would greatly appreciate them!
To those who have a problem with fat people and have nothing nice to say please just leave my blog and keep your comments to yourself. I have dealt with societies negativity enough throughout the years and don’t need more.