Unforgettable Words? (day 2/30)

It is day 2 of the 30 day writing challenge, and I have to say this one is really hard. I’ve been told things but I have always forgotten because it wasn’t so important. Unfortunately  I always seem to remember the bad things.

Day 2: Write something that someone told you about yourself that you never forgot.

Okay, so this is not going to be about being told something positive. Growing up I got picked on via school, my so called friends and even family. I was always told “you’re fat”, “you’re ugly” & “oh my, I’m so worried about you cause the size you are”. The last one is what I used to hear from family all the time and still do sometimes. The others was just people I went to school with starting in grade school, all the way up thru high school. I wasn’t that fat of a kid, I think I was maybe a few pounds overweight that was it. Yeah I’m not the prettiest thing, but c’mon don’t have to shove it down my throat. I think because of all that, I have social issues, I don’t know how to actually be social around people. I always feel out of place, I feel as if I stay in the corner away from everyone, and keep my mouth shut it will be the best thing.

Hearing that I was “fat” & “ugly” just made life so complicated. While I would walk in school I could hear people say stuff about me and just made it to where I hated everyone. My family have always said that they were worried about my weight and stuff, but I’ve had several tests done, I am plus size and HEALTHY!! Yet, they still cannot get that thru their heads. I think because of going thru all that I now don’t have confidence in myself, when I look in the mirror I see nothing but ugliness. I’m always dissing myself and people get mad at me for it. It’s like, um I grew up listening to it, it is embedded into my mind, it’s something I just can’t forget overnight.

Not a very positive post, but sadly it’s all I can think of. People have told me positive things, but they haven’t fully meant it, or it just didn’t mean much for me to remember.


One thought on “Unforgettable Words? (day 2/30)

  1. Pingback: Please, use kind words | raw honesty

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